Alastair Campbell - kicked out but not down

Alastair Campbell has been expelled from the Labour Party and it no doubt had us all gawping at the TV yesterday (May 28). The House of Commons must’ve looked like an episode of The Thick Of It (right).

In the European Elections, the former spin doctor to Tony Blair voted for the Liberal Democrats, making a last-minute twist to a heart-racing week of political drama.

In a flash Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn kicked him out like the loud kid on their final warning.

But who’s not been expelled from before? Who hasn’t been pulled out of a pub on a Friday night or kicked out of a club for head-butting the light fitting? It’s normal, right?

The CBJ team talk you through their own tumultuous times of being expelled.

Oliver Payne, 22, techno-fan and soup connoisseur

I have no outrageous stories of being kicked out of pubs in drunken dazes or expulsion from a school for being too cool – I wasn’t. In fact, in Year 9 I was in an art club. There were about six of us and we felt like the founding members of the Impressionist movement because they had literally selected children from each year. You could tell they instantly regretted getting me involved. Everyone there was so quiet and well behaved, it was no environment for the truly daring, passionate artiste that I was at that time. They just didn’t understand my work!

We (the quietest, most timid children of all time and I) were tasked with putting together a huge mosaic that featured pianos and singers and dancers and actors and celebrated arts in the school. It was great and we all worked – silently – on it every Wednesday after school for about a month, with teachers helping and watching over us. One Wednesday I was roped into skipping art club and drinking Fanta and eating chocolate in the empty school hall with my friends, hiding from remaining exhausted teachers and roaming cleaners with their reverberating, industrial machinery. I felt naughty but it was art club! Who cared if I skipped one session?

Well, it was coming to the end of the session and I waited for my brother to pick me up, hoping he wouldn’t sniff out the Fanta fruit twist on my sinful breath. I saw a friend walking up to the art room with his mum and he saw me and said ‘hey, my brother’s just made this crazy mosaic, wanna’ come see?’ ‘Hell yeah!’ I responded and we walked up to the art room. I didn’t think about it once.

I realised I had been hypnotised by both my friend and my stupidity. I was now in art club looking at the same mosiac I’d been working on for a month, muttering appraisal among parents. The quiet kids were staring at me and the teacher was absolutely livid. They put it up in the main hall without my name next to it like I never existed – I was the mistake, apparently.

Tiffanie Dumas-Mackrory, 24, hiking enthusiast and cat-owner extraordinaire

During a trip to the Safari Park in the Midlands, we entered a room called the twilight cave, not knowing exactly what to expect, we entered this dark enclosed room and was told to not make any noise.

Realising I had entered a bat cave I started to panic and couldn’t move. All you can hear are whooshing sounds of these bats fly next to you. Suddenly I kept feeling bats touching my legs, hair and arms as they were flying by and I just started to scream as you couldn’t see them and couldn’t avoid them.

I ended up getting asked to leave as I was scaring the bats even if they scared me first!

Sean Gleaves, 22, rollercoaster fan and food-fixated

Despite happening nearly 10 years ago I remember the moment vividly. The sound of smashing glass, the glaring faces, the feeling of embarrassment as my face turned a fiery shade of red. The moment still sends shivers down my spine to this day.

In Year 7, we were sent to a country home for a school trip. The day started off pleasantly with museum tours and tractor rides, the usual school trip activities, with the day ending in a small gift shop. With £5 in my pocket I decided to get my mum a souvenir.

At the back of one of the cabinets I saw a small heart key-chain made out of glass that was a deep aubergine colour (my mum’s favourite colour). It was perfect. I dashed over and excitedly reached into the cabinet, navigating past glass sculptures of all shapes and sizes

As I grasped the key-chain and started to pull my arm back, someone accidentally banged into my arm, causing it to smack into one of the larger sculptures. I watched in horror as it started to topple over, knocking over another sculpture as it went. Like a chain of dominoes, one glass sculpture after another began to fall and in a matter of seconds, three came plummeting down to the ground, smashing into little pieces in front of me.

In a state of shock, I stood there in silence as a crowd gathered around me and the store manager came rushing over with a look of fury on her face.

I was quickly kicked out of the shop, along with all my other classmates. My teachers had to negotiate with the manager as my measly £5 was obviously not enough to pay for the damage (the ornaments I had broken were worth £25 each).

I was still able to buy the key-chain though…

Hannah Fowler, 22, photographer and Lizzie Siddal lookalike

Unlike some of my friends and peers, I’ve never been kicked out of a pub or club. These days, I feel insulted if I don’t get asked to show my ID. It’s Challenge 25 but I’m only 22 – am I starting to look old?

Although, compared to the 18-year-olds I see on a night out now, I do feel older and I already can’t handle my drink as I could when I was younger.